A toddler in their “why” phase makes you realize how little you know.

— mahrukh (@parhloumahrukh) July 7, 2024

6yo: Is your boss a boy?

Me: Yes. But girls can be bosses also.

6yo: I know. Mommy is your boss at home.

— My Life As Dad (@milifeasdad) July 9, 2024

Me, with $33 left after paying bills: Let’s see how much a Land Rover costs

— Tracie Breaux (@traciebreaux) July 9, 2024

Kids have been at camp for 10 days now - we've been so curious to hear ANYTHING about camp and finally one letter came last week - which opened with the heartfelt and powerful words of:
"had to write this letter to get a snack"

— Tom Flood (@tomflood1) July 8, 2024

Law Enforcement: We're cracking down on distracted driving.

Car companies: We put a 9-inch TV in your dashboard.

— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) July 14, 2024

If we are ever in a non-laughing situation I beg you not to look at me, I do not have the strength

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) July 13, 2024

[relaxing in my hammock reading a book]

“Hey kids! We need to clean your rooms…come get me in 15 minutes.”

And that’s how you buy yourself a whole lotta peace and quiet😎

— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) July 12, 2024

Told my kid that his shirt was on backwards. He leaned in close and whispered, “I. Don’t. Care.”

— Midge (@mxmclain) July 10, 2024

Taught 8 how to mop the kitchen floor and most importantly, to say NO ONE GO IN THE KITCHEN. I JUST MOPPED AND YOU WILL FEEL MY WRATH IF I SEE ONE FOOTPRINT ON MY FRESHLY CLEANED FLOORS.

Let the circle be unbroken.

— Marissa 💚💛 (@michimama75) July 10, 2024

Me as a teenager: “I’m going to have a big house with a pool and giant walk in closet and I’m going to host big parties every weekend”

Me as an adult: “I can live in a shipping container in the woods? That’s awesome!”

— Hanging with the raisin girls (@TheHappySlut1) April 6, 2024

I would rather babysit 76 toddlers and 19 teenagers with no electronics for 7 days than go outside in that heat right now for any reason.

— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) July 12, 2024

FB marketplace makes you ask yourself how willing are you to possibly get murdered selling something for $50?

— 😺Cat😺 (@CatHunterESPN) July 11, 2024

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law

— meghan (@deloisivete) July 14, 2024

You can just start calling yourself an olympic hopeful. You don't have to fill out a form or anything.

— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 13, 2024

85% of my personality is just me walking around with a coffee cup.

— your other mom (@difficultpatty) July 11, 2024

One of the worst things about growing up is I can no longer use my mom as an excuse when I don’t wanna do something

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) July 14, 2024

I unfollowed a fitness instructor on instagram because they smiled too much. I need to see the scowls and grimacing this workout deserves

— Heatherhere 👽 (@Heatinblack) July 14, 2024

no parenting books or conversations ever prepared me for what to do when I hear "I was bored so I woke the baby up"

— Made in Cosmos ✨ (@made_in_cosmos) July 7, 2024