Last night, I hid the Oreos under my son's folded clothes in a basket and asked him to put it away... which he SWEARS he did.

Now he's standing in front of the pantry freaking out that the Oreos are gone. Who wants to tell him?

— KJ (@IDontSpeakWhine) April 7, 2023

I thought I was experiencing early menopause but it turned out one of my kids set the thermostat to 87°.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) December 7, 2023

My dad told my daughter she was the best duster ever then leaned in to me and whispered “if you tell kids they’re amazing at the chore they don’t bitch about doing it” and suddenly I’m questioning if I really was the most amazing weed-puller he ever saw

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) January 18, 2024

My toddler just walked by saying ‘cinnamon bitch’ over and over, and I felt attacked until I realized he meant ‘son of a bitch.’ Crisis averted.

— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) October 4, 2022

Mom grocery shopping alone: $130

Mom grocery shopping w/ kids joining: $175

Mom grocery shopping w/ kids & husband joining: $4085

— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) June 16, 2023

As we were getting ready to go somewhere my daughter asked “can we leave early if we get tired” and I’ve never felt more in sync with her.

— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) March 28, 2023

I took three children to Target to buy one $4 item, and I have regrets.

— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) February 20, 2024

1st kid: Height and weight carefully recorded monthly in baby book.

2nd kid: Growth recorded every once in a while on scraps of paper.

3rd kid: "Hey, where's MY growth chart?"
Me: "You grew. You're fine."

— I Might Be Funny (@imightbefunny1) January 20, 2023

"Hi, my daughter will be late to school because there’s a bump in her sock."

— Julie Burton (@ksujulie) September 11, 2023

My kids have a daily competition to see who wakes up first, if you’d like three children I’d be happy to pay the cost of shipping

— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) February 21, 2024

I always thought my attitude was so cute until I started raising a replica of myself.

— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) January 23, 2024

for me, gentle parenting is 90% trying to not lose my shit just because my kids are losing their shit ☺️

— emily petrini (@emilykmay) February 21, 2024

Went to a resale kids store today. my 3yo sold his toy truck and picked out a plastic lizard he wanted to buy w the money, named it, lady at the counter was like “i can’t sell this to you bc the price tag fell off” I swear all my polite left my body when I was like “yes you will”

— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) February 18, 2024

one of my least favorite pandemic things is that tmw instead of a snow day my 5 year will have “remote kindergarten.” REMOTE KINDERGARTEN?!?!? That’s not a thing!!!! all she should be worrying about tomorrow is cartoons & hot chocolate with marshmallows, I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) February 12, 2024

My 6yo got home from school and crawled into bed with a tube of pringles, so I guess it was a rough day in kindergarten

— meghan (@deloisivete) February 21, 2024