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#1
Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”
— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) April 22, 2024
#2
I had a tea party with my 6yo, and told her the pastries were delicious. She said her husband made them. She talked about her 3 kids and how hard it is to be a doctor. I asked how she's able to host tea parties with all that going on. She said she has a supportive husband.
— Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) April 21, 2024
#3
My daughter brought a giant stack of plates and cups out of her room, saw that I was annoyed, and said “should we just throw these away?”
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) March 6, 2024
#4
Parenting is wild, there'll be an umbrella in the shower and you won't even question why anymore
— Big, Bad Caffeinated Dad 🇳🇿 ☕ (@Cafeinated_Dad) April 14, 2024
#5
no one:
— meghan (@deloisivete) April 17, 2024
my 6yo at bedtime: what would happen if all your bones disappeared
#6
Parenting is a lot easier when the kids are in school.
— My Life As Dad (@milifeasdad) April 16, 2024
#7
Not to brag or anything, but I can cause a tantrum just by giving my kid exactly what he asked for.
— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) April 11, 2024
#8
Dropping a kid at a grandparent’s is like taking a car into the mechanic, you drop them because they’re driving you crazy and when you pick them up the grandparents are like: I don’t know what the problem is, your child is a perfect angel…for me
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) April 16, 2024
#9
When you let your kids dress themselves for school pic.twitter.com/8nxnUoVmI9
— Joel Jeffrey (@joeljeffrey) April 21, 2024
#10
honestly obsessed w the high drama of toddlers. my 2 year old fell & bumped her knee and she looked up at me like an ailing Victorian child & said “will I ever walk again??????????”
— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) April 9, 2024
#11
3yos be like, "awww Mommy I see that you are tired and overstimulated and the kitchen is too hot and dinner is taking forever and the baby is screaming but would you like to hear an intensely loud harmonica solo to top off the experience?"
— Amy Colleen (@sewistwrites) April 14, 2024
#12
My parents used to yell at me for forgetting cups in my room. Now I yell at my daughter for forgetting cups in her room. The cycle is complete.
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) April 13, 2024
#13
I did the age old threat to my 3 year old that if she didn’t pick up her toys all over her room that I would throw them away,….. this girl looked me in the eyes & said “do what you gotta do, have fun”
— 𝒥𝑒𝓌𝓁𝒾𝑒 (@jelly_ehles) April 11, 2024
MA’AM!!!!!!
#14
Me: You better eat your vegetables
— Mad Hatter Mommy!!! (@MadHatterMommy) April 20, 2024
My kid: but why
Me: they are good for you , they make your eyes brighter and skin glow
My kid (takes a hard look at me): I don’t think that’s true
#15
Me before I had kids: When I'm a parent, I'm not going to worry about bedtimes! If the kid wants to stay up late one night, I'll let them have fun!!!
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) April 15, 2024
Me with kids: If you don't go to bed by 8:03pm every single night I will literally die.
#16
Kids don’t know how lucky they are to have flashlights on their phones at concerts. In my day we had to hold up lighters and burned the first 3 layers of skin off our thumbs.
— Mommy Needs A Life (@mom_needsalife) April 18, 2024
#17
Why is the steering wheel sticky if the kids don’t drive the car, and other questions I probably don’t want the answer to
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) April 18, 2024
#18
Preschool teacher: “So when it comes to his school pictures, you might be … disappointed” lol I can’t wait to see these
— Jenée (@jdesmondharris) April 11, 2024
