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#1
Heard a woman in Target ask her kid ‘is that a smart choice to make with your money?’ and now I wish she would follow me around the store, too.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) September 22, 2023
#2
There are those who can’t relax when there are dishes in the sink and those who don’t even notice dishes in the sink and they marry each other.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) October 2, 2023
#3
People keep asking if they can help me by watching my newborn. She doesn’t make me watch cocomelon, leave toys all over the floor, or scream that her brother is looking at the her. Take the older two.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) November 23, 2023
#4
My toddler strung four words together for the first time. He said ‘stop talking to me.’ My heart is full.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) December 29, 2023
#5
The state of my house can best be described as ‘there seems to have been a struggle.’
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) December 26, 2023
#6
Forget coffee, I need whatever my kids are on.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) December 10, 2023
#7
Sex ed for teens should include loading kids, stroller, and groceries/sports equipment into the car while it’s pouring rain.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) September 24, 2023
#8
I don’t understand people who can fall asleep immediately, when do you do all of your panicking and overthinking?
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) September 3, 2023
#9
I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store, getting gas, and signing my kids up for fall sports.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) August 15, 2023
#10
As a wife and mother my hobbies include rage cleaning, rage cooking, and rage folding.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) August 3, 2023
#11
I need something stronger than sleep but less than a coma.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) July 17, 2023
#12
Whoever came up with the term ‘terrible twos’ obviously didn’t have any children older than two.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) June 22, 2023
#13
When my husband says ‘let me ask my wife,’ he’s just using me as an excuse to get out of whatever you’re asking him to do.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) May 21, 2023
#14
So animals can bury themselves in darkness for months and they’re ‘hibernating’ but I do it and I’m ‘depressed.’
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) May 17, 2023
#15
If by crossfit, you mean vacuuming the house while holding a toddler that doesn’t want to be held but also doesn’t want to be set down then yes, I do crossfit.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) March 2, 2023
